


Whole Again

by Killermanatee



Category: Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: Established Relationship, F/M, Late-night musings, Post Eternal Tide, post Endgame, relaunch books
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-02
Updated: 2017-11-02
Packaged: 2019-01-28 07:24:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,097
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12601332
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Killermanatee/pseuds/Killermanatee
Summary: Life goes on.A short moment set post "Eternal Tide" so if you haven't read the novel by Kirsten Beyer, this would spoil it for you so I won't say more.





	Whole Again

**Author's Note:**

> A gigantic thank you to the fantastic Helen8462 for the quick and precise beta-work. She found everything that required fixing and provided the input I needed. You rock!

It is late when Kathryn keys in the code to the quiet sanctuary of the private quarters behind them. She enters the blissfully dark room and when the doors close behind her, she exhales. The tension of the past hours falls from her neck and turns into lead down along her body. She has been back among the living for five days, yet it feels exponentially longer. Even without the rush of events that have occurred since her return it would still have been a lot to deal with, but as things are, the number of briefings, communiques and long distance strategic discussions have swallowed a large amount of her time. Not to mention the personal side of returning to the living. Because how do you announce your return from the dead to those most dear to you, who have worked so hard to overcome their grief? 

She rubs her neck and takes the pins out of her hair. As it begins to fall loose, the tension disappearing from her scalp feels heavenly. She drops the pins in the bowl on top of the dresser and refuses to look at the pads stacked next to it. They probably hold more urgent information that demands her immediate attention, but for today it has just been enough. 

The room is only illuminated by the stars and it feels so good to be wrapped in silence and the muted light she has long since grown accustomed to. Seeing her little part of the universe in the sparkle of millions of suns will never lose its humbling effect on her. The knowledge that life has continued since her death and will continue without her, puts everything into perspective. 

Kathryn turns away from the windows and very quietly makes her way to through the bedroom, careful not to make any noise and ducks into the fresher. Once the doors are closed she quickly and as efficiently as possible goes through her nighttime routine, opting to just set her shoes and clothes aside in a pile to take care of in the morning. Stripped down to her panties she catches a view of herself in the mirror and takes a minute to pause. She has seen herself die in uncountable ways, has felt her body being torn apart, and yet here she is, exactly the way she was when she entered that Borg cube. She ponders how amazing it is what appreciation you can feel for a middle aged body when you have acutely felt the lack of a physical form. 

Once the lights are out, she leaves the fresher and it takes a little while for her eyes to adjust to the darkness of the bedroom. When they finally do, it is not lost on her how as the world emerges from the darkness, it is Chakotay who is at the center of it. He is fast asleep on what has become his side of the bed. Technically the whole bed is his, but since her return it has quickly become clear that one side is just hers now. It has also been without questions that neither of them bothers with clothes to sleep in. There has been duty between them, distance and even death. Now that finally they can feel each other’s skin, they can’t get themselves to obstruct it. She is sure the need to feel each other to this extend will eventually pass, but she is in no hurry to get there, and since it is currently obvious he is at least shirtless, he seems to be on the same page. 

It has been five days since she came back. Five days since her heart almost broke at his disbelief. Five days since she thought she had lost him. Five days since she started to spend her nights in his quarters. Five days are nothing to the cosmos and yet their lives have been changed completely. 

As she stands there now in his bedroom in nothing but her panties, it is almost overwhelming. How she was given this chance with him. How suddenly there is this fixture in her life that has brought her nothing but joy since her return. They are on board their ship, in the place they have called their home, if even reluctantly, but things are now so very different. 

Now when the nightmares wake her, he is there with her, warm and solid and bringing her back to reality. A reality in which her days end by sliding under the covers with the man she loves, who loves her in turn and the ease of it all is something she never would have dreamed of. 

She gets into bed and scoots close to him, pressing her chest flush against his back, her nose pressed against him, breathing him in. As she slides her arm around his chest, Chakotay stirs and tucks her arm under his, entwining their fingers. It brings a smile to her lips. 

His voice is heavy and mumbled when he speaks. “What time is it?”

“Almost two am.” She slides one leg in between his, trying to get as much contact as possible and his heat spreads all the way through her, into her bones, warming her from the inside out and it seems impossible that there was ever a time she willingly went without this. 

Chakotay rubs his foot along her calf. “They are aware you came back human and still require basic human upkeep, aren’t they?” His voice is still low, but there is a hint of annoyance in it. He has become quite protective of her needs and while he might have felt the way before, he is showing it freely in their time spent together. 

Kathryn kisses his neck, just below his hairline, and presses her lips against his skin for a second longer than necessary. “It’s fine. They have questions and I have a lot to catch up on.”

Chakotay sighs. “Just please don’t overdo it. Did you eat something?”

Kathryn chuckles. “Yes, I did. The Doctor followed me into the mess hall and made sure of it.”

He raises her hand to his lips and kisses her fingers. “Good.”

She adjusts the arm she is lying on. She still needs to relearn how to share a bed with someone. But she is perfectly content spending her life perfecting it. She presses her nose into his hair and her world is engulfed in his scent and warmth.

Chakotays breathing is becoming deeper and she feels him sliding back into sleep, her hand still cradled in his.

**Author's Note:**

> Feedback is life, ya'll! <3
> 
> Now everyone come join our Voyager book club on Tumblr. ;)


End file.
